I want to applaud former President Bill Clinton for his recent trip to North Korea to negotiate the release of the imprisoned journalists. Some of us are born diplomats and some of us aren't. I noticed we did not send GW Bush. And they did not send me.
In my youth I used to do anything (often self-destructive) to a avoid a fight or not burn a bridge. I listened to a relative, a visitor in my own home, call me insane and crazy and held my tongue. I later quietly suggested to his wife they might cut their visit short or find another place to stay. But there was no yelling and hitting on my part at that time. Or most if not all of the hundred other times I suffered his verbal abuse.
Somewhere in my thirties it dawned on me that holding my tongue was directing a lot of anger that belonged elsewhere back at me. I was chronically depressed, had a problem with alcohol, and liked to toy around with suicide attempts. I say toy around because the major criteria for any attempt at suicide was to not leave a mess someone else would have to clean up. Then I began cleaning up my act. I learned to say no and enough. I stopped saying I was sorry and told people it was not my fault.
I am no longer chronically depressed. But a consequence of telling people where they could get off with unacceptable behavior is I have not talked to my brother in twenty years. (See earlier paragraph about relative.) I have not missed the chronically abusive relationship at all. But lately I have been in contact with his son (who is also not talking to him) and his daughter who is. Via e-mail she gave me her dad's telephone numbers and said he would like to talk to me and urged me to call HIM.
I am disinclined to acquiesce to this request. And karma be damned. I am totally happy with my life just the way it is. Now should he call and apologize I will accept it. But I doubt we have a future relationship unless he has undergone a sea change in spite of what today's horoscope claims. I have moved on and I don't need him to approve or disapprove.
BTW one response to karma can be that you are not going to go through a lifetime with that person ever again.