It Isn't That Simple - DTJ

I worked for over two decades in the construction industry. My first job was as a Submittals Engineer for one of the big five. I was hired because of my bartending skills. Bartenders are not just mixologists but stand up comediennes and trained diplomats. 

Three of my regular happy hour clients around the circular bar were executives for that construction company and they had a problem. Their CEO was a serious abuser of women, and the federal government, for whom they worked, wanted more women beyond the secretary level. They figured I had the skills to be one of the boys.

Those skills did not come from a college course though I had my degree in an age where women were seen as going for their Mrs. degree instead of a MBA. I had worked in a Senatorial office in DC, and as an administrative assistant for a lobby group. I spent time as a manager of a retail outlet, and in the entertainment industry. I was tending bar because it was the only place I could make as much money as a man without selling my body (or giving it away to the boss).

I was one of the first women to blog about Me Too when the silence breakers started speaking out. So, when I say I am on Senator Al Franken's side in his role of sacrificial ram to the current witch hunt (and believe me women can be witches with a B) I come to that conclusion from knowledge. I have been there. Women can and do lie.

It was that damn photograph. I am so thrilled I lived my wild and crazy youth before the video camera and most definitely before the cell phone. Still there may be some glossies which at the time seemed totally innocent. But cast parties are cast parties. And then there was the 10 day raft trip down the Colorado River with a group of 30 largely nudists. 

I am glad women are finally speaking out but we, and by that I mean women, need to find some balance. This jump on the bandwagon and bare our souls brings out those who make things up. And if we turn this into a no holds barred witch hunt we will be back on pedestals in Ivory Towers (spotless kitchens), and unemployable because the bosses don't want to take the risk. Better to be a survivor than a professional victim.

There will always be some men who try but as I learned there are also many diplomatic ways to dodge those moments. There are even "proper" ways to hug. We need to take responsibility for our own actions, and address issues and misconceptions one to one before taking it up the ladder or to the press.

I feel very strongly that Senator Franken is a victim. The first two accusers were Trump voters. And the Democrats decided to throw him under the bus without a hearing. The GOP, however, is volunteering to support Trumb and Moore who are sick aggressors. And I won't be a part of either party. But I support the women who opt to not put up with this behavior any longer.