The Week Upon Reflection

It has been an interesting week. Faced the fact that the used camper shell would not do as I could not get two friends together on a non-windy day. When you have tried to do something for a month and there has always been something to prevent it you should just get the message and give up.

Yes, spring is windy in New Mexico. Yes, everyone complains of it as if it never has happened before or anywhere else in the world. Our winds are straight and not circular so I try not to mention it. Like Mark Twain said, "Dog bites man is not news." The only thing more tiring than listening to gale force winds is listening to people complain about gale force winds. So I will admit I am not the friendliest of souls in the spring. Add to this spring the final preparations of the one woman show in Trinidad, Colorado and I have become a virtual hermit. No camper shell and I was trying to think of another solution to the art to Trinidad problem also.

And then Angel Fire was doing what it always does in the spring, "Oh, did I say May for that? Well, I need you for end of June instead." They also forgot I said no end of June and no July. That time is all about me. I am doing pet sitting but no people hand holding.

I went to a writing workshop some time back and had the pleasure of listening to a presentation by Rita Mae Brown, author of Ruby Fruit Jungle. She said she had at long last decided that being a writer meant no relationships and no pets beyond maybe a cat if you really want to write. I think the same is true of painters though I have managed to train dogs to put up with my muse days. The cats have been prone to sit on a newly stretched canvas.

My problem was that I did not paint for two years and I sucked some of my casual friends into unrealistic expectations. And me. I thought if I could train my dogs to ignore me when painting I could do the same with friends. So I informed them I was going to be largely unavailable for their pleasure for the duration. But would from time to time, if taking a break, try to include them in my plans.

Yes, Rita, it did not work. Even my black out dates did not work because of that slide which occurs in spring. I am told, by a long time friend, I am not a more successful artist because I am too unfriendly and inflexible. Translation: I am unwilling to listen on the phone to her tales of woe for longer than five minutes or totally change my schedule to accommodate her change of schedule. I will admit I am overly fond of the phrase, "Make it march. My paint is drying."

She is reminding me entirely too much of my mother. The dogs are accepting the morning walk is often later and that I am walking the other direction to not wake up her dog. Last complaint from her just before she complained I never stop in for coffee in the morning. Well, I was told she wanted to be alone and heal. Which did fit with my need to spend more time painting.

Why do I expect them to listen to what they say when they do not listen to what I say?