Learning My Limitations

Wheeler Sans Snow with the new lens


 In consideration of the question - which should go - I decided not photography. It is my window to the world, and a tool I use for painting and marketing and recording. But I could alter my approach to it a bit. I opted for a new lens, 18 x 400mm zoom. It lightened my load.


The world with my 300mm


It doesn't always have to be all or nothing. Moderation in all things including moderation, says the person with over 20 orchids. That was not entirely my fault. I had 13 and I ordered four baby cattleyas. Somehow I received 10. I gave a couple to a friend. Split one of my old cattleyas and gave one of those away. A Moth orchid is having a keiki. Okay, so I am failing at moderation. Well, except for the camera bag. It is smaller.

Yesterday, I spent the day in the studio cleaning up the orchid space so they are not so crowded. Besides I had to find space for the humidifier. Cattleyas like the world more moist. I also adjusted painting supplies. The new paints got put away to clear space on the table to work. I studied the canvas on the easel. I think I at last know where I am going with that. I just stared at the stacks of fabric. Three new projects to begin when I have the time.

An article I read recently on the internet said the 40 hour work week is a myth. Of course I immediately argued before diving into the text. Most salaried workers, and the self employed work 60 a week. And the hourly worker cannot exist on what he earns in 40 so takes one or more "part time" jobs.

All that is true but not what the article said. Seems the basis for the 40 hour work week was a person could earn enough to support themselves and a non-working partner. That was probably myth back in the beginning, but another article no doubt. The non-working partner, wife if you will, could accomplish the errands, shopping, laundry, cooking, and cleaning, oh, and child rearing. (See already the premise of a 40 hour work week, or non-work week, being sufficient to maintain a family is in error. Besides where deemed to not be work. So let her get a job.

Already I am feeling less inadequate. How can I, a lowly aging single business owner, supposedly retired, find time to keep my studio, let alone run my own errands, do my own shopping, laundry, cooking, and cleaning? Never mind my vegetable gardening, keep my flower beds, and house repair and maintenance up to my own standards. And during covid with the studio shut down I took on some extra tasks to feed me. I started Dog Gone Park and took in dogs to care for. And I remodeled the apartment and turned it into a short term vacation rental. I was going to hire all the cleaning out. Dream on. There is no one to work. They are probably still trying to catch up with all that non-working spouse stuff.

"You are over-stressed," a friend on Facebook noticed. "My sister and best friend is dying," a provide as an excuse.

"You need to take that new lens out and have fun."

"When?"

I have it marked on my calendar for Christmas Eve or Christmas day. It is the traditional time my sister and I would jump in the Rubicon and hit the empty state parks, because everyone is home messing up their houses. This year it is to be the memorial photography trek solo. I have to clean the vrbo on the 26th. I need to raise my cleaning fees. I am underpaid. And no paid holidays. Or compassionate leave.

But I said NO this week. Twice. But still felt horribly guilty. Us Binford girls never say no. Hold on to your hats because I plan to say it a lot more often. I have to make room for that non-working part of my life so I can enjoy a day out with my new lens, tend those orchids, and maybe even clean my own house.


What a Cattleya Orchid bloom looks like


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