Once more with feeling

Elk Dawn at Black Lake
I am a writer of journals and blogs, a maker of goals and affirmations, a believer that the future is a gift we have the opportunity to shape. So with the last day of 2011 before me I pulled out my journal and looked back to the same time last year. And then the year before.

I had begun 2010 with a lofty and extensive list of goals. I accomplished less than half. I was grateful I did that much but it did effect my list for 2011. That list is only 6 items: 1) Move beyond the events of 2010, 2) Be more positive in my outlook, 3) Set my own directions, 4) Set more adventurous directions in my art, 5) Look at doing poetry/art book, 6) Keep website more current.

I have failed miserably at number 6 which now adorns my todo list for 2012. And I will admit that it took me almost all of 2011 to get number 2 and 3 accomplished. And I can still be overwhelmed by grief from time to time. I am busy working on poems to fit various pieces of my works and have tracked down an on-line publishing option. I bought the latest version of Wordperfect office to assist in this goal. Dare I list Complete poetry/art book on the 2012 agenda?

I am most happy with my accomplishments on number 3 and 4. When I listed them in the short list for 2011 I had no idea what shape the achievement of them would take. So in that regard they were more affirmations than todo list items. Or even resolutions. I only knew that I was vaguely unhappy with the "eye candy" paintings I was turning out for shows and exhibits. I wanted to be more meaningful. And last year was filled with new departures on subjects for paintings. And surprisingly I found myself leaving a gallery that had long represented my work, and looking for new ways to exhibit my art. And I found myself deeply involved with photography. The year 2011 found me entering three exhibits with my photos and winning prizes in two. I also won a prize with one of my "dark" paintings.

I like the directions I have explored artistically because of those two affirmations and I want to continue to move along that path. I use the big artistic change as the reason I am behind on my website. I think it requires rethinking it entirely. (PS another computer crash did not help). No, I do not have the completed list for 2012 yet. This is the beginning of that process and I am somewhat behind if you go by dates on the calendar. Maybe I will just try harder on the 2011 list once more.

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