Biggest Lesson of 2010

Just tried to log on to my bank account and failed the security questions. Don't you hate those questions? You fail just because you forgot to put an "S" on a word or capitalize your high school. And fail the questions twice and you are locked out.

The worst websites for security are banks of course. And oddly enough my insurance company. How often do you log on to your insurance company web page? With me it is twice a year and it seems as if every time I have to redo my password or some security question. I have come to expect problems but I have no problems generally with my bank account. In fact this is the first time I can remember being asked my security questions. Has my identity been stolen?

That would be the icing on the cake for 2010. This year has been so horrid I refuse, like other friends, to take inventory of it. Instead I have done a couple blogs on best memories and best gifts in an effort to accentuate the positive and ignore the negatives. This blog is about the biggest lesson of the year: I am not in control. I am helpless like the early blooming rose that gets hit with a killing frost.

Yes, I knew I had no control over the economy or rising electricity rates or a very cold winter. But I thought I had control over my health and H1N1 proved I didn't. At the beginning of the year it looked as if the court case would be settled but it still isn't.  And before anyone asks I haven't a clue. I was smug about backing up my computers but who knew the external hard drive would fail. Or my computer expert would blow it. Or that Microsoft would again lie about Windows and I would need more upgrades on software than I can afford.

If any one single event proved I was helpless it was my extended battle with HP over the faulty computer. And maybe I battled so hard on that losing front because I wanted just one small thing to go right in 2010. I wanted to win just one tiny little battle. Several friends lost the biggest battle.

So while I am thrilled to just have some frost on the petals I am setting no goals for 2011. That seems like a total exercise in futility. I am just going to keep on keeping on one day (sometimes one hour or minute) at a time. Like I learned riding roller coasters, all you really can do is hang on for the ride.