Sunday, January 15, 2017

Dark Times Journal - Who I am January 15, 2017

Storm Coming
I live in a Blue state. But in a very rural area (Red), visited by many people from Texas (Red and Fundie). And I am an artist and an introvert who lives rural. Especially in the winter the majority of my interaction with others is on the internet where I get to largely pick and choose who I interact with.

But there is a storm coming. If the weather bureau got it right this time. I picked up a house bound friend and we ventured to the local market filled with visitors and shopped for some comfort food and snowed in with no power supplies. The safety pins on my lapel were getting some angry looks. Some of them were still wearing Trump campaign buttons.

We escaped to the soup aisle with the tiny section of organic soups. To shop organic we have to go over the mountain, but a storm was coming. So we contented ourselves with organic baby spinach and a few organic soups, fire starters, some bottled water just in case.

I admit I am not fond of this chain store which bought the local market. I especially hate their prices and that they stock their shelves just for the tourists. I really do not like jalapenos that much. But on this particular day if felt really hostile.

I asked myself if it was me or them or just the approaching storm. Guess approaching storm can be taken a couple ways. On to the library where recommended some books by an author I enjoyed before, Anne Perry. We were treated to the story about how as a child Anne had killed her friend's mother. She had been convicted only of participating in it. The teller had other facts wrong but she really emphasized gay. And questioned whether we would still want to read her books.

Our aging full time population has many widowed or single women and we support each other by helping with tasks and errands. Are our long time friendships to be called into question every time we check out a book or buy organic curried lentil soup?

Or is it just me? Do I no longer feel safe out in the general population? I must watch that this does not limit my freedoms. To what extent do we quarantine ourselves?


  1. It's intrusive and rude of strangers to speculate/question the tastes and actions of those they are supposed to serve. Whether it's buying organic soup or borrowing a book. But people are rude these days. In this country we say they are 'too damn farse and outta place' Farse meaning fast. We should never allow the ignorant to limit our freedoms but sometimes the effort to protect ourselves by quarantining is the less exhausting option. I seem to have quarantined myself in the last nine weeks. I go to work because I have to, interact because I have to but at the end of the day, I close my door and find solace in my own company. I don't suppose I will remain a hermit forever but at the moment I have no enthusiasm for the numerous invitations, weekends away and 'let's go out for dinner/drinks'etc. I keep family close as they do me and that is enough for me.

    I know my circumstances are different to yours but the cluck clucks and advice I am receiving are not what I want to hear at the moment.

    You have uncertainty ahead of you. We are all extremely worried by possible future events in the US that will undoubtedly affect the entire world. Not a very appealing prospect.

    Don't let ignorant people destroy your brain, your optimism for life. This too shall pass and God does not sleep.

    1. Thank you for your kind and considered comment. We live in uncertain times. And far away from each other. But feel free to PM or email me when you want a sounding board. I am beginning to realize how very important emotional support is even to us tough people who have done it all by ourselves all our lives.


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